Hello sir, might I interest you in a nice cognac from 1893? Only £1075 a bottle, quite a bargain.No? Not old enough and/or expensive enough, you say? Ok, well how about a bottle from 1865? A steal at £1949, and in no way does it taste like gasoline. Fantastic.
Still no? My, sir is quite the connoisseur! Well we do have a bottle of scotch for £5000 from the 1950s that sir might like. Yes? Excellent choice sir, I'll wrap it up right away! Oh..no need to wrap it up? You'll just drink it here? I see, well done sir.
